The unpleasant visit that had repeated since she turned 17 had come again. Max scrambled out of her chair in her attempt to save her beautiful satin dress which the seamstress had intricately sewn for two full weeks.
As soon as Max asked Rudis for help, the servant immediately brought her hot water, a clean linen cloth, and a new dress. Max frowned in disgust, wiping clean the blood between her legs with a hot wet towel, then wore a thick linen-lined cotton underwear, turning to look in front of the mirror several times to see if there were any stains on her hips that she had missed. She didn’t particularly like wearing the underwear as it made her hips look big like a duck’s.
The uncomfortable feeling of her sore lower abdomen felt like there were cold pebbles housed in it and it annoyed her. The thought of having to endure this for a minimum of five days made her sigh.
“Don’t be too disappointed, milady.”
Max turned at Rudis with a puzzled expression at the sudden words of comfort. The maid then continued to speak in a cautious manner.
“Some couples take more than three years to bear their first child. If you wait with an eased heart, God will grant you the most beautiful child when the right time comes.”
Max blinked blankly. Only then it occurred to her that the inconvenient phenomenon she was experiencing meant that she was not pregnant with a child. Max spoke slowly as anxiety took over her.
“Isn’t it strange… t-that it came… s-so late?”
“It’s just that the timing isn’t right.” Rudis reassured her with a tender smile. “Milady’s expectations must have been set high, since it came at the end of the month. It’s normal for it to come late at times… do not worry so much Madam.”
Ironically, Rudis seemed more disappointed than her when the words flowed out of her mouth. Max didn’t even realize that she was late. In fact, her cycle had been more regular after staying in Anatol. Before, she had her period once every two or three months, and there were times when it wouldn’t come for even five months.
She bit her lip, confused. Did other women bleed more often than her? What about Rosetta? She squinted her eyes and groped her hands trying to focus and search in her memories, but nothing came to mind. The two sisters weren’t close enough in the first place to exchange such private matters.
Thinking of the possibility of not being able to conceive a child because she happened to have a big flaw, a cold sweat ran down her spine. Her mother’s haggard, lifeless face flashed on her head. Max turned around, trying to hide her agitation and nonchalantly ordered. 𝘙𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯.𝘤𝘰𝘮
“I want to drink a w-warm tea. A herbal tea…can you brew some for me?”
“Of course, madam. I’ll prepare it right away.”
As Rudis went out of the room, Max collapsed helplessly in front of the desk and clasped her face. She wanted to tell Rudis the truth and ask for advice, but she feared that she would tell Riftan about it. How would he react if he finds out that there might be something wrong with his wife?
She was well aware of how important it was for men to have an heir, it was no question that Riftan would desire a son to pass on the castle and the territory. Her throat felt like there was a thorn stuck inside it. Will he still cherish and care for her even if she happens to have the same fate as her mother?
Max flipped through the parchment nervously. However, as the pain in her stomach grew worse every second, even if she was able to gather her thoughts momentarily, it was immediately shattered. She stared aimlessly at the swimming letters on the parchment before throwing her quill in frustration. That made the ink splattered, creating a messy stain on the desk. Max stared at the mess silently, then lowered her head against the desk as she listened to the raindrops. hitting the windowpane.
Just why do worries chase my life? Her eyes darkened at the thought that a fatal one could add to the list of her dozens of flaws.
Stop overthinking. Rudis is right, it’s just not the right time, she thought to herself desperately. That wasn an old habit of her, torturing herself with the worst and most grim future she could possibly have.
She had the perfect husband who was beyond what she thought she deserved; there were more people whom she could talk to; she had a safe and comfortable place she could call home; she was beginning to overcome her stutter bit by bit; she was even learning magic!
Max desperately drove herself away from the worries trying to eat her mind. If God was indeed merciful, she believed that surely one day he would grant her the blessing of having a healthy heir.
Riftan returned to their room drenched and soaking from the rain. His robe was heavy with water and drooped like seaweed, revealing the shape of the armor he wore underneath and his shoes were covered with mud. Max got out of bed and placed a towel over his head. His cheeks were wet from the rain and cold as ice.
“All this time… have you been under the rain?”
“We had to stop the soil and mud from flowing down the road. I can’t let the hard work we did for the last two months go to waste.”
He pushed the door close with his back and took off his muddy shoes and soaking robe on the spot, avoiding soiling the expensive carpet on the floor and threw them into a basket.
“Is it raining…t-that much?” Max asked, a little surprised by all the considerations he needed to take into account.
“I don’t think it will pour much heavier. The problem is that the ground has been weakened by monsters. Also, the summer monsoon will begin in a couple of months, so it is better to be prepared ahead for it.”
He took off all his armor and wet clothing. Max led Riftan in front of the fireplace and handed him a towel large enough to wrap around his body. While he briefly warmed his body in front of the fire, the diligent servants brought a bathtub filled with hot water into the room. As always, Riftan asked for the two of them to take a bath together, but Max only stood stiffly with an awkward expression plastered on her face and announced to him that she was ‘unclean.’ He looked at her with a puzzled face.
“If your body isn’t clean then you can come and wash with me.”
Max was a little startled that a man who was capable of doing anything would say something so unthoughtful. Since she came to Anatol, she had only had menstruations four times: once when he was away, and the other three when he was rather busy, therefore there hadn’t been any need to explain such an embarrassing situation. Max stuttered, abashed.
“It’s t-that day…”
“That day?”
Max looked at him with tears in her eyes. Her husband, who she thought was the most perfect man in the world, wore a stupidly clueless face. Her eyes darted from side to side, thinking of how he could be so clueless. How on earth was she going to explain her circumstance without losing her dignity?
“What I mean is…from today until the end of t-the week… we can’t… do m-marital duties… because of my c-condition.”
“What on earth are you talking about?” Riftan’s face stiffened. “Don’t talk in riddles and explain it clearly. Are you rejecting me right now?”
Max’s jaw dropped blankly at his questioning tone. It seemed like she had no choice but to explain in blunt words for him to understand. She exclaimed with tears in her eyes.
“There’s blood in m-my thing… it’s f-flowing!”
The blood from Riftan’s face drained in an instant. Max’s eyes widened at the sight of his chiseled, tanned face turning white as a piece of parchment. He walked over and proceeded to check every corner of her body with evident shock and anxiety.
“Blood is flowing… where on earth is it? How did you hurt yourself? Show me where, we have to get you treated right away!”
Max felt terrified that he would really check where the blood was flowing from, but Riftan seemed even more frightened than she was. Max desperately dissuaded him, who was trying to strip her of her clothes to identify where she was bleeding from.
“I-it’s n-nothing like that! I wasn’t h-h-hurt! I’m not hurt!”
“You said you’re bleeding!”
Heavens. He really didn’t seem to have a single clue about what women have to regularly go through. Max didn’t know whether to react by bursting into laughter or scream in frustration. She decided to calm him down first and explain as composed as she could.
“In t-this world… all women at m-marrying age… b-bleed regularly. It’s a very… natural occurrence. My n-nanny said… to be able to bear children… that is the p-proof.”
“Are you sure? Aren’t you sick or hurt?”
Max nodded with conviction. Riftan’s eyes frowned slightly, looking at her in disbelief and suspicion, and asked.
“Where on earth are you bleeding from then?”
Max turned red as a beet. She never dreamed of ending up in such an embarrassing situation. Did she really have to explain everything to him by herself? She hesitated for a moment, then whispered in his ear even though there was no one else around. They may encounter the same circumstance in the future, it would be better for her to explain everything properly than to be subjected any longer to such an embarrassing situation.
“Is that… true?”
After hearing her explanation, Riftan’s eyes drifted down to her, his eyes widening in disbelief. The color in his face still hadn’t returned.
“Are you sure? Down there… it’s normal for blood to flow?”
“It’s-it’s perfectly normal! It’s something that all w-women have to g-go through.”
“This must have happened before. Why didn’t you tell me earlier?”
“Because I thought… you k-knew… f-for sure…. Usually this doesn’t need to be e-explained…. My nanny said… if I tell it indirectly… you would k-know…”
To her surprise, Riftan’s cheeks blushed a little red. Riftan raised his voice and said his excuses, trying to justify his ignorance.
“Maxi, I grew up in a mercenary full of men. After I was knighted, I have been on expeditions and battlefields all my life. What on earth would I know about women? All I know is that women have breasts, there’s no way of knowing what they’re thinking, and that they may bear children!”
Max looked at him doubtfully. He made it sound like he had never had an intimate lover before who could have taught him everything there is to know about women. She was skeptical as she scanned with her eyes his angular, masculine face, intense dark orbs, and his chiseled body; everything was in symmetry. He was too perfect and handsome to claim that he doesn’t know much about women.
Even if Riftan didn’t actively seek out mates, he still would have women flock around him. Max remembered the two brazen women at the festival who flirted with him. It was unlikely that a man having vigorous desires like Riftan would have been able to resist such aggressive temptations. She glared at him sharply with jealousy.
Note – Nymeria: I was a bit angry in the first part tbh. Maxi’s irregular cycle back in the duchy was most certainly due to her being malnourished… Ugh, that sorry excuse for a father! And the poor child doesn’t know anything and thinks it’s another “flaw”… Oh sweet baby! ?
But then Riftan lighted up the mood and made me laugh so hard, oh boy, I had to stop reading for a moment there because I was laughing soo much lmaooo
