Riftan had appeared again as usual. He had been coming to the library frequently to find Max, which made Ruth sigh in frustration this time.
“Don’t tell me you’ve finished training already?” Ruth told Riftan.
“Training in cold weather drains strength. The guards need a breather for today to recover properly.”
Riftan responded dryly to the question, approaching Max from behind and bowing his head closer to hers. Max’s cheeks colored as the texture of his cold lips touched her forehead. He gently rubbed her hair and whispered
“Have you been stuck here since this morning?”
“I-in the mo-morning, I stopped by the st-stables.”
Riftan appeared dissatisfied. He frowned and grumbled.
“Don’t you spend longer here than in bed with me?”
“We-well, nuh-no. About the same.”
Since Riftan’s return to the castle, he spent much longer in the bedroom. Max’s face turned red, recalling how much time she spent in his arms almost every night. Riftan groaned near her eye and hugged her shoulders tightly with both arms.
“Don’t you think I’m good enough?”
“Can you please be intimate when you two are alone? Where I can’t see you?” Ruth said, bored.
“Just look away.” Riftan said.
“Why don’t you go back to your room? To make me more comfortable. This atmosphere is too much for me.” Ruth told Max.
Max couldn’t lift her head. She clasped her fiery hot face. Riftan clicked his tongue and pulled on Max’s arm.
“Good. Let’s go to our room. Hold onto me.”
“Ri-Riftan.”
Max tightly gripped the edge of the desk. She was too ashamed at this point to go their bedroom.
“To-today. The-the tasks you had to-to do today. Have you finished?”
“I left my patrol duties to another knight. Why aren’t you getting up now?”
Riftan was impatient and tugged on her arm again, but Max held the desk more tightly. While she enjoyed her time with Riftan, it was too embarrassing to stay in bed during broad daylight. What if the servants gossiped badly about them? She closed her eyes and moved her eyeballs back and forth in embarrassment, waving an arm at the stacked books near her.”
“Ah-ah. I ha-haven’t finished reading.”
“Read later.”
“To-today, I pl-planned to read these.”
Riftan scrunched his eyebrows together in dissatisfaction.
“What the hell are you so obsessed with?”
He took a book from the stack on her task and looked it over. The pages were filled with all sorts of intricate figures and ancient words. He looked at Max again and frowned.
“What is this? Are you trying to learn magic?”
“Didn’t you know?” Ruth said. “She’s been learning magic from me for weeks.”
Riftan, who was still rifling through the pages stopped and raised his head, his eyes flashing.
“What?”
At Riftan’s reaction, Ruth glanced at Max, confused.
“Hasn’t she told you yet? Your wife may have a talent for magic, so I’m teaching her little-by-little.”
“WHO WANTS HER TO?!”
Riftan shouted fiercely, throwing the book away wildly. Max trembled. She didn’t know if she would’ve had permission, so she hadn’t asked, but she thought he would be happy if he knew she was learning magic for him.
“Having wizards at hand are an incredible resource.” Ruth countered. “Moreover, recently, there’s been a decline in wizards, which means less people to take on apprentices.” Riftan was still upset.
He lashed out, blaming Ruth.
“This all started when I went to take out those damn Goblins.”
Ruth didn’t know how to react and responded, slightly ashamed.
“I don’t mean to teach her offense magic. But wouldn’t it be a great asset to Anatol if your wife could do simple defense or healing magic?”
“I don’t need the help!” Riftan burst. Max grasped fabric on her knees tightly. When Riftan saw her face turn white and scared, he swore and squeezed her shoulder, trying to calm himself.
“I didn’t bring you here to use you. I…I just want you to be comfortable. Magic is hard work and consumes a lot of strength.”
“I’I’m no-not trying to do so-something dangerous. I-I just want to-to be helpful.”
“I’m saying I don’t need it!”
Max looked at him in shock. Riftan hesitated and touched her face, his tone impatient.
“Don’t look sad. I’m not mad at you. You-.”
He couldn’t find the words to explain and bit his lips. A strange silence fell upon the library. Riftan continued to shift his gaze between Max’s discouraged face and Ruth’s disapproval. He swept his hair with one hand roughly. A cold look passed over his face.
“Do whatever you like.”
He turned away and left the library. Max watched his back hopelessly.
Riftan didn’t come back until dark. Max wandered the room anxiously, looking out the window constantly for him. According to Rodrigo, Riftan wasn’t armed and had taken his horse to leave the castle.
Max felt like the blood was drying in her veins. The three cats, who had been sleeping comfortably near the fireplace, came out from under the bed and cried and groaned, as if expressing her feelings for her. She took one cat on her lap, petting it, then lied down on the bed and quietly closed her eyes.
She couldn’t understand what had made Riftan so angry. Was he upset that she hadn’t told him she was learning magic? She should have asked his permission before she had started.
She bit her nails nervously, lost in thought when she heard a rattling sound. She hastily closed her eyes and pretended to sleep. She could tell by the footsteps who was coming.
Max didn’t have the courage to see Riftan in the face. Riftan approached her silently and carefully pushed the cats off the bed back into their basket.
She listened, wanting to know his mood. Riftan placed the basket near the lit fireplace, took off his cloak, and hung it off to the side. He sat down on the bed to take off his boots. Max waited for him to lie next to her.
He didn’t move and just sat for a long time. Feeling rejected, Max bruried her face deep into her pillow. He didn’t want to lie next to her, it seemed. She had disappointed him. She had just wanted to support him. Was she too incompetent to be trusted? She bit her lips. He had said so firmly that he didn’t need her help. His words had struck her painfully. She curled her back to hide the hurt on her face.
At that moment, a rough finger gently touched her cheek. Max held her breath. Riftan gently cupped her cheeks and pulled a few strands of her hair away. Even without opening her eyes, she could feel his intense gaze on her, as if her face was right next to the fireplace.
He continued to sweep her hair away and took her fingertips to his lips. Max automatically shuddered from his touch. Did it seem like she was rejecting him? Riftan flinched and slowly returned her hand to her side and began to move away. Max hurriedly grasped his hand.
“Ri-Riftan!” But after holding onto him, she didn’t know what to say. Max looked at him cautiously. Did he know she was only pretending to be asleep? He didn’t seem surprised she was awake. Underneath his fringed hair, his eyes, dark as ink, looked at her without expression. She shriveled at his look. Maybe he was angry at her. She was terrified.
“I’m, I’m sorry. I’ve done wrong,” she said recklessesly, although she did not know exactly what she was apologizing for. Riftan drew in a short breath and hugged her.
“Don’t apologize. You didn’t do anything wrong. I just..”
Cold fingers penetrated her hair and touched her scalp, wrapping themselves around her small head. Max exhaled as Riftan buried his nose in her chest. Her shoulders trembled. Riftan rubbed her back and said irately.
“Don’t act so scared all the time if you can learn magic.”
“Nuh-no. I-I’m not scared. Really.”
“Don’t lie. You’re trembling. Dammit. I barely made you laugh. Now we’re starting all over.”
“Nuh-No. I’m not afraid.”
Max trembled and bit her lip. She was relieved that he was being affectionate again, but could hear the sadness in his voice. She grabbed the hem of his sleeve as Riftan held his forehead grudgingly.
“I-I don’t nuh-need to learn.”
She felt Riftan’s arm wriggling underneath his sleeve. He shook his head vigorously.
“You don’t get it” he said.
“Is muh-me he-helping you a nuisance?”
“It’s not like that.”
“I-I wuh-want to do so-something for you. I-I wish to do this.”
“Even if you don’t do anything!”
Riftan said violently. He sighed in agony and swallowed before kissing her lips hungrily. Max pressed against his face, his hard chin shaking under her hand. A small line of saliva dripped over his thick neck. Riftan pushed his tongue into her mouth and tasted her slowly, tenaciously.
